How to Tell the Boss You're Pregnant (Last Part)

Should I discuss my pregnancy during a new job interview?

During a new job interview, it's discriminatory and thus illegal for employers to ask you if you're pregnant. But if your condition is obvious when you go for your interview, it's a good idea to bring up the topic after focusing on your skills, experience, and enthusiasm for the job. Once the interviewer is interested in your qualifications, incorporate your post-baby plans into the conversation without making them a primary focus of the interview. State your plans in a business-like manner and be prepared to answer questions about the logistics of your maternity leave, your return to work, and your ability to manage your job when you have a newborn. Try to inspire confidence without promising too much.

If you aren't showing signs of your pregnancy yet, you'll need to decide whether or not you want to say anything. It might not feel right to tell a relative stranger your good news, especially if you haven't yet told your friends or family. If this is your first pregnancy, you might not honestly know how you'll feel after your child's birth. Will you want to return to work immediately? After three months? After a year? You may need more time to consider your options and determine your post-baby plans before making promises to a new employer.

On the other hand, a new potential employer may appreciate your honesty if you decide to discuss your pregnancy up front. This will also give you a chance to openly discuss your potential employer's health benefits during the interview or with an HR person to determine what kind of coverage you'd have for your pregnancy and new baby before taking the job.

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How to Tell the Boss You're Pregnant (Part 3)

What if my employer isn't supportive of my pregnancy?

Steel yourself: Not every supervisor can muster an appropriate and gracious response to this kind of news. We know one mother whose news was greeted with rude dismay: "Oh no, we've never dealt with this problem before!" The sad truth is that your pregnancy can affect how you're treated at work. Your boss and co-workers may worry that you won't be coming back, your work will suffer, or your responsibilities will be dumped on them. If you receive negative feedback, respond professionally, positively, and firmly. Assure your employer that you'll do whatever it takes to ensure a smooth transition for all involved.

If you're demoted, laid off, or even fired after making your pregnancy known, look into your rights under the Pregnancy Discrimination Act, which prohibits job bias or discrimination against pregnant women. Consult your human resources or union representatives about your situation if that seems appropriate. If you've been let go unjustly, consider hiring a lawyer to help investigate your case.

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How to Tell the Boss You're Pregnant (Part 2)

First, do your homework. Find out what your maternity leave options are. Do some research and review your employee handbook. Or discreetly contact a human resources representative who can inform you of your employer's formal policies regarding pregnancy and maternity leave. HR representatives will likely offer you informed and objective advice, since they've probably counseled many women in similar situations, and they won't be personally affected by your upcoming absence.

You may also want to confer with your co-workers who have already traveled this path. (Make sure you can trust them with your confidence, as you'll want to be the first one to tell your boss.) Ask them what their maternity leave proposals were like and what kind of a response they got when they announced their pregnancies as well as who in management was helpful -- and who wasn't.

Then, make a plan. Figure out how much time you think you'll want to take. If you're considering unpaid leave, think about how much time you can reasonably afford to go without your salary. Consider whether you'll want to take maternity leave in one block of time or whether you'd rather split it out over the year. Plan to offer your boss solutions rather than problems by having some ideas for how your work can be handled while you're away.

Your boss may want to know whether you plan to return to work after your leave. If you know that you won't be coming back, the ethical thing to do is to let your employer know up front even though it means forfeiting your benefits. That said, if there's any chance that you will return to work, it's smart to leave this question open. It can be hard to predict how you'll feel once you have a baby and what your needs as a family will be in terms of time and income. You have until the end of your leave to decide whether you'll come back full-time, part-time, or not at all, although it's nice to give your boss as much notice as you can.

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How to Tell the Boss You're Pregnant (Part 1)

When should I break the news?

Many women wait until they're through the first trimester, when the risk of miscarriage goes down significantly and they're confident of keeping the pregnancy. But you probably don't want to wait until you're obviously showing. Here are some factors to consider as you decide when to make your announcement:

• Whether you're having any complications due to your pregnancy. In this case you might be relieved to tell your colleagues early in your pregnancy. If you're suffering from morning sickness or just generally fatigued, the knowledge of your pregnancy will help others make sense of your situation.


• If you have a very strenuous or stressful job. For your baby's sake and your own, you'll probably want to come clean early on. Making your announcement right away will allow you to talk about changing your job responsibilities in a timely manner.


• Whether you think the news will be well received. This will depend on such factors as the culture of your workplace, the extent to which it has been affected by other women's pregnancies, and your relationship with your supervisors.

As long as you're confident that your employer will handle the news in a professional manner, it makes sense to announce the pregnancy as early as possible. This will enable you to take advantage of any employer-provided services that can help make your pregnancy healthier and less stressful. Some health services offered by employers (such as prenatal genetic counseling) are most valuable in the early stages of pregnancy.

Unfortunately, though, some employers may be less than enlightened about pregnant employees. If you're concerned about your employer's reaction, proceed cautiously. In other words, consider waiting to tell your boss until your pregnancy is 14 to 20 weeks along. At this point, you've already demonstrated that you can do your job while carrying a child.

You may also want to time your announcement to coincide with the completion of a big project. By doing so, you'll send a strong message: I'm almost half way through my pregnancy, and my productivity is unaffected. Finally, you may want to wait to tell your boss until after a salary or performance review to make sure the news doesn't influence how you're treated.

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